Blog post # 23:
Made this picture today:
"Spectra Of Theoretical Smoke".
Why is "slippery" the adjective form of "slip"?
"Slippery" sounds like it means "related to or similar to a slipper".
We should instead say, if something slips or causes slipping, that that something is "slippish" or is "slippy".
As in: "The icy sidewalk was slippish".
That's my opinion.
You know what word I like, but I don't like what the word stands for?
Also, I like the word "spillage", but I don't want any spillage.
"Spillage", it rhymes with "pillage".
Pillage is also a word I like the sound of (although not as much as I like the sound of "spillage"), but I don't like what the word refers to.
Okay, time to get serious.
Time to get... cRaZy!!!...
Insanity is the topic for today.
I have been diagnosed with OCD. I am on medicine for that, and the prescription drugs have been helping.
But today I had some... slippage... back into the other side of sanity.
Just a little bit, yes, but enough to lead me to write about it here as a form of self-therapy.
(Talking to myself. -- Why do crazy people talk to themselves? Because they can't always afford to pay someone else to listen...)
So, I get these "evil" images and thoughts in my mind. They are not really evil -- they are just ordinary pictures or people I have seen in a magazine or newspaper or on TV or whatever, and I arbitrarily declare them "evil". Why do I do this? Don't know really, for different reasons. I can't really help it, at least when my drugs are wearing off.
So, then I feel like I have to cast a magic spell on myself -- just because I am feeling down about something, and I feel out of control.
But to do this, I have to think of a "good" picture or name or person or whatever.
Today I thought of this picture I made:
But then, INEVITABLY, the "evil" thoughts intrude on my "good" thoughts. Every time I try to think, just for a couple seconds straight, of a good image, the evil image gets in my head.
This happened today when I was on my walk, so that I stand there with my eyes closed and my ears plugged, looking quite mad. (I AM mad.)
Then, I finally get things straight. (Yay!) But a red car just happens to drive by. Red cars are a bad omen. If a red car drives by, that means I have to do the "spell" all over again.
So, finally I finish, no evil thoughts, no red cars. Yay! Hopefully I can stop doing this nonsense for a long period of time now.
I realize that I must seem like a freaking madman to you all.
(Now, now. The term "madman" is politically incorrect!
The correct term is "mad-PERSON"!...)
But YOU seem crazy to me when you go to church like clockwork and pray (cast spells) to an invisible "god", and when you say you believe in "angels" and "demons" and all that.
You have your rituals. I have mine. Deal with it.